Dear Tony

Another birthday without you. I hope that you are happier where you are and you are enjoying having mum and dad to yourself.

Life is a bit strange here. As well as the restrictions that are in place, there is uncertainty about jobs which of course brings emotional and financial worries. Charities are suffering a lot as events that would be held to raise funds have been cancelled. I’ve decided to set myself challenges and give a small amount of money to charities each month.

For the month of August, I did 10 days of alternate 5k running and walking. I started running about 6 months after you left us in 2016. As well as health benefits, exercise is also great for our mental health. I always think of you when I run. I wonder if it would have helped you if you had taken up something like running.

I actually chose to do this challenge after seeing Macmillan advertising it. I didn’t get sponsors though but gave a very small donation to them. I loved the walks and will continue with the 5k route which took me by our family house, over the bridge as mum would say which led to the park we liked to visit as children, then up to the Green Dragon before returning home. Not a scenic walk but one full of memories. This route takes me around an hour. I listen to the Joe Wickes podcast who always had interesting guests talking about what they turned to to help their physical and mental health. A very interesting listen. I finish off listening to radio 2. I ditched my favourite radio 1 shows long ago but interestingly some of the DJs that we would have listened to now appear on radio 2!

In honour of your birthday, September’s charity is Mind. This is another great charity and one that is in great need at the moment. I have chosen to try to improve my running and am aiming to run 30 miles in the month. I am running 1 mile runs for 3 days, having a day of rest and then running a 5k. So far, and I’ve only run 2 of the 5k runs, managed to improve my times. Now Tony, when I say running, I am actually very slow but at least I can run for a bus now.

I can see how tough life was for you with all your mental health problems. Listening to Joe Wickes asking his guests what they do to keep their spirits up made me ponder how I would answer. One of the first things I like to do is bake. I also like getting lost in a book, playing games on computer such as sudoku and solitaire (can be very addictive!) and cross stitching. Being out in the fresh hour to run or walk also helps. For you, getting out of bed to do these pastimes would have been a major hurdle. Hopefully charities like Mind will be able to continue to help people like yourself.

You are always in my thoughts.

Sleep tight.

Your big sister

Tina x

P.S. I still love the picture of us when I visited you at your school. I can’t quite believe I was actually taller than you for a while!

P.P.S. On my mile run today, I actually did a personal best of 11.13 min/mile!